A Mother’s List: The Top Ten Things I Wish Would Never Come Out of My Mouth Again
Not every day is blissful in the Land of Motherhood.
As mothers, the reality is, we make these statements, or statements like them ADL (all day long). I’ll count down some of my favorites to number one in David Letterman style.
Number 10: Who left their retainer on the bathroom floor?
Number 9: Those birds are going to be given away to a loving family unless someone cleans their cage!
Number 8: Homework is meant to be done, not admired from afar.
Number 7: I don’t care if it’s called goulash; it’s what I made for dinner, so eat it!
Number 6: Did you guys wash your private parts? Wait, let me ask that again…Did you wash your private parts well?
Number 5: Who clogged the toilet with half a roll of toilet paper?
Number 4: If you have to “toot,” please remove yourself from the kitchen table.
Number 3: If I have to say it again, I’m going to lose my mind.
Number 2: Five, four, three, two…
Number 1: That’s it. I’ve officially gone insane.
6 Comments
Kate Policani
I can relate to this list! Sometimes I think I need a little recorder with buttons for each phrase so I can just push the button.
Cheryl Klein
Just noticed the sidebar about your book. Exciting!!
Steph's Scribe/Stephanie Verni
Cheryl,
Decided to self-publish it. That’s enough of it sitting around collecting dust. Time to put it out there.
🙂
I’ll keep you posted. You get a big shout out in the dedication page.
xx
Stacey Haines
Was there a little bird in my house when you made up this list. Many of these I say on a daily basis but with some substitute words….Oh the joys of mothering.
Steph's Scribe/Stephanie Verni
Stacey,
Which words might you use instead?
Grown up ones?
😉
emtieman
There is a consensus at our house that, if we were the kids, we would be mortified that you posted number 6. My personal list has shorter phrases… Stop, Knock it off, do you remember ANYTHING?, If you do that again… Be Quiet!, Must you ALWAYS argue?, Please behave, Thank God I only have 7 more years before you turn rational again, UGH., and my personal favorite… If you keep it up, one of us is not going to make it to your eighteenth birthday, wanna place a bet on which one?